...one more day and it will be one month since i moved to the UK....I still remember the first day when Alma - my good friend living in London picked me up and took me out for a crazy night in O'Neills a crazy pub with live music...It is really cool place...good music,freedom and a lot of diversity...
Visiting some places in London and enjoying the breeze of Thames, the light rain falling down while you are enjoying a coffee on a terrace at 12 in the afternoon on a Sunday, reminded me of my life in Austria and Romania and miss it. It is not easy to feel that you belong to two places still you are living in a different one....
I am living in a small town close to London with 4 other young people in the house....still besides the kitchen and the bathroom nothing connects us. It is hard to be here in this small town with no person that I feel a deep connection with....sometimes I feel alone...still I am lucky to have Alma-my Romanian friend in London that makes me feel secure and relaxed whenever I spend time with her...
Last week was the first break down I had since I came here...getting homesick and missing friends, put me down and made me ask myself: "why am I really here?"..."Is it worth missing the moments I could spend with my family and friends ?"..."Is it really career what is my first priority?"....
...I still don't have answers and more......new questions and thoughts are arising in my head....new emotions and feelings are going through my body...Sometimes I am not even able to recognize or say what I feel and why I feel like that...
Speaking about how I feel is hard as I tend to believe that nobody really understands me.UK is a fake environment...people are smiling because it is polite to do so....they are asking "how are you doing?" but they don't really care about the answer or how you feel.
... this consumes me a lot and pushes me bak in my shell....I have days when I don't speak with people and I spend a lot of time reading...
This weekend I realized a lot of things regarding my life and what I really appreciate.
...on Friday evening we went to a Brazilian club to celebrate the starting of the Carnival...
...South American opened spirit,people dancing samba like crazy,good music and a lot of PASSION!!!
Looking at the people of the London School of Samba I saw the passion and the diversity I so much feel connected to...a 60-65 years old guy,an old lady,young boys or girls,dark skin or white,in wheelchair or standing, their eyes had strong sparkles and they faces were shiny when they were playing different instruments to create a beautiful samba rhythm...in their SIMPLICITY they taught me not to loose my passion and to seek for it in everything I do...to take time to paint and dance...to play and travel...to write and cook...
Sunday as well was the battery recharger for my soul...qualitative time spent in pajamas having honest and open discussion,sharing thoughts with my friend,cooking and playing...laughing and feeling good made me realized that is all about how I want to see the situation....thanks alma and dan for being next to me...
I miss home a lot...I miss Austria and my friends there...I miss my sister....still I have hope and believe that this experience will make me discover new things about me and the world around...curious,excited and thoughtful I am having my eyes and ears largely opened to see what is next....
Visiting some places in London and enjoying the breeze of Thames, the light rain falling down while you are enjoying a coffee on a terrace at 12 in the afternoon on a Sunday, reminded me of my life in Austria and Romania and miss it. It is not easy to feel that you belong to two places still you are living in a different one....
I am living in a small town close to London with 4 other young people in the house....still besides the kitchen and the bathroom nothing connects us. It is hard to be here in this small town with no person that I feel a deep connection with....sometimes I feel alone...still I am lucky to have Alma-my Romanian friend in London that makes me feel secure and relaxed whenever I spend time with her...
Last week was the first break down I had since I came here...getting homesick and missing friends, put me down and made me ask myself: "why am I really here?"..."Is it worth missing the moments I could spend with my family and friends ?"..."Is it really career what is my first priority?"....
...I still don't have answers and more......new questions and thoughts are arising in my head....new emotions and feelings are going through my body...Sometimes I am not even able to recognize or say what I feel and why I feel like that...
Speaking about how I feel is hard as I tend to believe that nobody really understands me.UK is a fake environment...people are smiling because it is polite to do so....they are asking "how are you doing?" but they don't really care about the answer or how you feel.
... this consumes me a lot and pushes me bak in my shell....I have days when I don't speak with people and I spend a lot of time reading...
This weekend I realized a lot of things regarding my life and what I really appreciate.
...on Friday evening we went to a Brazilian club to celebrate the starting of the Carnival...
...South American opened spirit,people dancing samba like crazy,good music and a lot of PASSION!!!
Looking at the people of the London School of Samba I saw the passion and the diversity I so much feel connected to...a 60-65 years old guy,an old lady,young boys or girls,dark skin or white,in wheelchair or standing, their eyes had strong sparkles and they faces were shiny when they were playing different instruments to create a beautiful samba rhythm...in their SIMPLICITY they taught me not to loose my passion and to seek for it in everything I do...to take time to paint and dance...to play and travel...to write and cook...
Sunday as well was the battery recharger for my soul...qualitative time spent in pajamas having honest and open discussion,sharing thoughts with my friend,cooking and playing...laughing and feeling good made me realized that is all about how I want to see the situation....thanks alma and dan for being next to me...
I miss home a lot...I miss Austria and my friends there...I miss my sister....still I have hope and believe that this experience will make me discover new things about me and the world around...curious,excited and thoughtful I am having my eyes and ears largely opened to see what is next....
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